Sitting here watching Hollywood 411, William & Kate's wedding. Prior to this was a show on Princess Diana. Watching that show really brought back memories of wanting to be like Diana. Wanting to be compassionate like Diana. Wanting to be a loving mum like Diana. Wanting to be glamorous like Diana. Heck, if I could be a Princess, that would have been FAB! I remember watching some of the wedding in 1981. I was eight and I think we were living in Texas. I remember thinking "There is a King and Queen? Wow!" About that time is when I became very interested in Fairy Tales, Robin Hood & King Arthur. In Junior High (Seattle) and High School (Seattle, Weaverville & Kodiak), I used to fantisize about meeting a mysterious stranger, falling in love and being swept off to a castle in Europe. Deep down, I knew that would not happen. There was still a bit of hope. Even when I attended Stirling University in 2000, I still had hope. I read alot about the current Royal Family. Even wrote a paper in High School about Queen Elizabeth. I also collected magazines that had Princess Diana featured anywhere in them. Imagine my delight when I found out there was a magazine devoted to Royals! In 1986, when Andrew & Sarah married, I was in awe. I gobbled down every bit of information I could about them. I think that is when I really started reading as much as I could about the Family. I remember where I was when I heard Princess Diana had died. August 31, 1997. DD18 had turned five a couple days before. I was in the car, when it came over the radio. I was stunned. My heart mourned for the loss of her bright star. I knew the heartbreak her boys would feel at the loss of the beloved mother. I cried because I knew then I would never meet her. Yes, as an adult, I still held hope that I would become a Royal. I stayed up to watch the Funeral. I remember my mum and I talked and watched. When I left, I went home and cried. While in Stirling, I discovered that one of the buildings had been dedicated by her in the late 80's. At that moment, I felt a bit close to her. I wanted to pay my respects to her before I left England, but did not get a chance. Between money and time, there was just not enough of either. I had taken a package with me. I had put out a book at MSC for people to sign. I had sent some of the pages to the British Consulate in Anchorage. Still had some left that I planned to hand to the Guard at Buckingham Palace. I still have the package. I did spend 48 hours in London, so I had enough time. I just didn't get to drop it off. Anyway, watching the shows brought back, almost, a pineing for my teenage dreams. I kind of miss that. The hopes for an unknown future. Expectations for my path. Dreams of a Happily Ever After.


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